The one thing that I know now is that I should have done everything I could to learn to be responsible for myself and to be able to be live independently. So many young women like me fail to realize their own self worth and live life relying on others, particularly men to take care of them.
I always found myself counting on others to take care of me. I had no confidence that I was able to be independent. I relied on others, my sisters and two husbands. I was afraid that I would not be able to meet financial matters such as rent and basis necessities on my own. So I lived with my older sister for some time and then I married too young for all the wrong reasons. I needed someone to take care of me. Well, that never worked out the way I had hoped it would. I ended up taking care of a husband and three young children.
Eventually, that marriage ended and I began the first steps to finding the confidence to live on my own, raise the children pretty much on my own. I also found out at that time just how important education was. Although I had finished high school, I had no real job skills that could lead to a well paying job. But I survived. I went back to school and learned some skills. One thing I did find out was that I was very good with money management. Having little money will teach you some good lessons in money management.
Now that I am older, I look back and realize the many opportunities that I could have taken advantage of but when I was young, I wasn’t even aware that these opportunities existed. Joining a branch of the military, the peace corps or working my way through college would have all been great opportunities. Oh to be young again and know what I know now.
I survived those young years and I learned many valuable lessons that would have saved myself and my children a lot of heartache and pain. Number one, get that education before you get married or have children. Number two, have confidence in yourself to survive. Number three, good planning and good decision making will save a lot of pain and heartache. And finally, number four, learn to be independent.
